When you come to a fork in the road, take it...

I love Yogi Berra.  His witticisms, which are legend, are often so true and really hit at the heart of the matter.  When you come to a fork in the road take it....it seems illogical, but think about it.  How often are we split between decisions, and end up not making one, or deciding to do both things?

It is wonderful when the path becomes clear.  What if there is more than one path to take, and you want or need to take both.  Is this possible?

I believe it is.  In fact, I believe that this happens often to people, and that eventually, if we believe in ourselves, the two paths are just one that converges at some point. 

What do you think?

Paying Forward a Great Summer

This has been an interesting summer. I am a lucky person. I have an amazing life, an amazing family, work that interests and rewards me in myriad ways, and, hopefully sometimes allows me to help others. 

Satch and Janey now

This summer was very much like others in some ways, but very different in others.  if you follow my blog you know that I had preventative surgery in mid June.  I had my ovaries and Fallopian tubes removed.  It was a decision that was always in the back of my mind since my Mom, Jeanne, died of ovarian cancer almost 13 years ago at age 61. Her ovarian cancer was preceded by breast cancer.  As the oldest of 5 siblings I felt like it was up to me to do research and make my Mom's legacy one of healing and hope, not fear and ignorance.

My research took me to two genetic Counselors and a number of doctors, specialists and my therapist who I talked everything through with just to make sure I was sure.  I was.  I had the procedure laparoscopically at Memorial Sloan Kettering.  It was same day, outpatient surgery.  Pretty cool.

Luckily for me, my siblings, my father, friends, my husband and daughters were all very supportive. My clients were amazing also, lending support and compassion for me, a fellow human being.  Blessings and peace to you all.

My original plan had been to have the surgery and feel well enough to attend the Newport Folk Festival at the end of July.  I made it and the folk festival rocked.

I had a couple amazing experiences before and during the surgery.  When getting ready to do my pre-admission testing a few days before the procedure, I knocked over, by accident, my toiletries kit that has a million things in it. I caught it as it was tipping over.  The only things at fell out were a name label "hello my name is Jeanne" which my mother had written her name on.  It was in a little purple mesh bag inside my kit that had been hers.  I had saved it all these years but the name tag never fell out before (though I take it out and look at it sometimes).  The other thing that fell out were 3 bandaids.  My friend Karen Noe says that that is a 100% sure sign from your loved one.  It really was pretty amazing.

Among the many things I am grateful for is my complete healing.  When I was being prepared for surgery, laying on the operating table and talking to the anesthesiologist, she put the mask over my nose and mouth and I began to silently pray the Hail Mary, a very beautiful prayer of devotion and protection that every little catholic child learns. The Blessed Mother is the catholic version of the devoted, sanctified mother of the avatar, not just any gal.  I imagined her above me to the right and knew that no matter what happened, everything was going to be ok.  It may sound like a platitude, but growing up Catholic and going through the many metamorphoses that we Catholics do, the Blessed Mother has been a constant.  So, to my mind, my two mothers were truly with me and I could relax.

In the first weeks post surgery, my husband Jim made my life as stress free as possible, which was a really fun place to live.  My sisters were all there for me, and I was amazed by their sweetness.  My daughters were amazing and giving of their time and patience too.  My father worried, and I hated to put him through it, but he was a steady rock and has been compassionate and kind beyond words.  If you know me you know that this is a true and incredible gift.

Right after the folk festival, we got a new puppy, Satch.

Satch at 2 weeks old

Janey and Mickey a couple years ago

Our doggie Mickey died at age 6 this spring and it was sad.  After a full court press, Jim got his wish - a new golden retriever to keep our other retriever, Janey, company. I am glad we did it. Satch is an awesome little guy, and I don't know who is happier, Janey or Jim.

Just to be straight and clear, this was not a huge surgery and my recovery was swift.  My discovery was that I want to live, and hopefully I will do so for a long time.   I am open to speaking with others who are considering the procedure.

Great Cross Post on Surviving Ovarian Cancer

Please check out this great blog from Heather Von St. James, Mesothelioma Survivor

It is about Olympic Gymnast Shannon Miller's triumph over ovarian cancer.  Please click here to follow this post. 

Heather recently contacted me to ask that I cross-post this great story about Shannon.  How could I say no?  The more we do to spread awareness of the symptoms of ovarian cancer, the more women will  live!

Back in the Swing

After three weeks of rest and restoration, I got back to work a week ago and jumped right back in.  I missed my colleagues at work and my clients.  I have a lot of catching up to do.  However, I have to admit that it was wonderful to be able to spend time with my family and friends for this brief time.

Kuan Yin, Goddess of Compassion

My husband took time to just be with me, and made our time stress free, which I truly appreciated.  I was waited on hand and foot.  I have never lived a hard life, but I have lived a life typical of a wife and mother, and a working person.  It was very nice to take a break from everything.  I read, I rested mind and body when I grew tired, ate when I was hungry, studied beautiful things and listened to music.  I visited with my father and my aunt and cousins.  I visited the shore with one of my daughters.  It was a beautiful time of year to take a break.  My older daughter moved to a new place, and we were able to spend a bit of time, though she and my younger daughter were both busy with work most of the time.

I am grateful to be given this chance for a longer, healthy life.  I am learning to try and continue to nurture compassion for others, and to send love to all, to be mindful and attempt balance in my life.

Nine Days In - Thumbs Up

photo courtesy of

bloggersodear.com

Day nine in my post surgery recovery is a thumbs up!  Reporting on my ongoing experience with recuperation from my procedure has meant being gentle with myself when I am too tired to do the things I normally do,  like go out to dinner, work at my desk or take a walk.  I have enjoyed taking walks with our doggie, Janey.  She has enjoyed them too.  I'll miss having the time to meander and enjoy her company when I am back at work.

Janey

 

 My doctor and his staff have been great in helping me normalize the usual little pains and aches that are common post surgery.  I am not a medicine person, and haven't taken any pain medication since 3 days post surgery.  After speaking with their office today about a little continued discomfort, they encouraged me to take a little acetaminophen or ibuprofen.  I guess I can do that.

Going back to the topic of work, having time to rest has given me some space in my brain to consider what is most important to me.  I continue to keep up with work via phone and email.  I have been spending time with my husband, and my girls, when they are not working.

I realize that I work well no matter where I am, and am considering the possibility of telecommuting one day a week.  I drive to Westchester County, NY from Bergen County, NJ four days a week, and back to my private practice in Bergen County for evening appointments mostly every evening.  I see clients in NJ every Friday all day.  While I love both of my jobs, I began to think about the wear and tear on my body.

I have colleagues who telecommute regularly.  Maybe it is time for me to join the ranks, maybe one day a week.  We will see!

Anti-Ovarian Cancer Diet

endive

red onion

branzino/sea bass

Another post on Dr. Mehmet Oz's website, reported through an article written by Dr. William W. Li, MD, outlining an anti-ovarian cancer diet.  Li purports that onion (especially red onion, uncooked), endive (uncooked, 1/2 cup 2x a week), fish (6 oz, 3x week), especially branzino type sea bass, but primarily keeping an eye on Omega-3's (salmon is an excellent choice too) as well as fresh tomatoes, are deterrents to ovarian cancer.  Here is a simple guide from an online article written by Joanne Eglash, Diets Examiner, of The Examiner.com, if you are interested, for further information.  

While this might seem a bit extreme, if we at least begin to smatter our diets with these healthy foods may be helpful.  

Keep in mind, however, especially regarding fish, to keep an eye on sustainability and health.  Monterey Bay Aquarium regularly updates regional seafood guides.  Follow the guide and click on your local region for more information on safety and sustainability.

Lastly, consult your medical professional before starting any new diet.

photos courtesy of Examiner.com

Dr. Oz's campaign - Break The Silence on Ovarian Cancer - worth checking out

I am fortunate - I am cancer free and grateful.  However, I feel that part of my Mom's legacy is to help inform others to stay healthy.

This checklist can be a lifesaver - check out Dr. Oz's Break the Silence on Ovarian Cancer website and checklist.  Can be a lifesaver for yourself or a loved one.  Posting in honor of my mom, Jeanne, who would have been 74 this past Wednesday, June 20, but died of ovarian cancer at age 61.  We miss her every day.

Take a look at the checklist.  There are actually a number of warning signs that help you become informed.  If you think you might be at risk, take the checklist to your doctor.  You can ask for the following screening tests:  CA125 blood test, recto-vaginal ultrasound and trans-vaginal ultrasound.  They are easy tests to take, and can help you become informed about the health of your body.

Quoting from Dr. Oz's site, "Too many lives are lost because early warning signs are missed or misdiagnosed. This stops now. Dr. Oz teamed up with the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition to create this vital one-sheet. Print and fill it out, then take it with you to your physician to start the discussion on ovarian cancer."

The earlier a person is diagnosed and properly treated, the better chance for survival.  Some people do not have symptoms.  However, many people do have symptoms, such as bloating, early fullness when eating, pain in the lower abdomen.  Reading and listening to stories about women who experience these symptoms reminded me of my mom, who searched for a couple of years for answers to these symptoms, only to be told that tests were unreliable, that her symptoms were normal symptoms of menopause, etc.  The truth was that she had an early stage of ovarian cancer.  She was not diagnosed until she was at stage four.  Even so, she struggled bravely to survive for almost five years.