Thanks to Marc and Angel for writing such an uplifting and helpful blog!
1. Criticizing everyone and everything.Life isn’t perfect. People make mistakes. Let go of unfair expectations. Stop criticizing yourself and others for being human. If you feel like everyone is judging you all the time, realize that human beings often feel this way when they are too busy judging themselves.
2. Believing that you have all the answers.Criticizing has a big brother: the know-it-all-syndrome. The older you grow, the higher you rise in your chosen field, and the more you achieve, the more likely you are to think you know it all. The measure of your intelligence and success in life will be in direct proportion to your ability to change your mind and let it expand. If someone is able to show you that what you think or do is not right, thank them and happily adjust. Seek the truth. Never stop learning.
3. Trying to control everything.Craving control leads to anger and unhappiness. Life is to be lived, not controlled. Powerful, positive change will occur in your life when you decide to take control of yourself instead of craving control over everyone and everything else. Realize you haven’t lost anything; you were never in control of the uncontrollable to begin with. (Read The Power of Now.)
4. Dwelling on what used to be.When something negative happens, view this circumstance as a chance to learn something you didn’t know. Don’t wish it never happened. Don’t try to step back in time. Take the lessons learned and step forward. The past is valuable. It provides a solid foundation for everything you’re doing now. Learn from it – the mistakes and the successes – and then let it go. Because only when we let go of what used to be, do we grow and begin to see a world we never knew was possible.
5. Wanting everything you don’t have.Life is NOT short if you spend every waking moment appreciating it. It’s just that by the time most of us catch up to appreciating what we have, we’ve already squandered our time and left life at least halfway behind us. The key is being thankful for what you have NOW.
6. Whining and doing nothing about it.Complaining does not work as a strategy. Those who complain the most, accomplish the least positive results. When you spend time fretting and complaining, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.
Don’t talk about what’s wrong. If you took a fraction of the energy you put into complaining and applied it to solving your problem, you’d likely be stunned by how well things can work out. Start talking about how you’ll improve things, even if the conversation is only with yourself, and then focus on the next positive step. Refocus your energy into making your situation better. (Read The Power of Habit.)
7. Fearing everything for any reason at all.Sometimes we’re afraid we’ll fail. Sometimes we’re subconsciously afraid we’ll succeed, because then we’d have to deal with all the disruption (growth) and change that follows success. And other times it’s our fear of rejection or simply our fear of looking like a fool. So it’s easier to hesitate, to wait for the perfect moment, to decide we need to think a bit longer or do some more research or explore a few more unnecessary alternatives.
Meanwhile days, weeks, months, and even years of our precious lives pass us by. And so do our dreams.
The best way I’ve found to let go of fear is to stare it down. Connect to your fear, feel it in your body, realize it and steadily address it. Greet it by name if you have to: “Welcome, fear.” And then take action! Whatever you’ve been planning, whatever you’ve imagined, whatever you’ve dreamed of, don’t wait another minute. Get started! Take the first step. Do something. Do anything. Learn as you go and watch as your fears slowly subside.
8. Spending time with people who drain you.It’s not always where you are in life, but who you have by your side that matters most. Some people drain you and others provide soul food. Don’t jeopardize your dignity and self-respect by trying to make someone accept, love and appreciate you when they have proven that they are incapable of doing so.
When you leave the wrong people behind, the right things start happening.
And Marc and Angel's question for you:What could you stop, subtract, or let go in life that would make you feel happier and more at ease? Please leave a comment below.
photo by me, taken in Disney World, Epcot Center, Japan, 2012