Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Meditation Practice begins Friday evening, Jan 6 in Bergen County with Mary Beth

Meditation Training
Learn to quiet your mind and turn inward for many physical and emotional benefits.  It is okay to be a beginner or a skilled meditation practicioner. 

Ongoing First Friday of the month – call ahead to register.  ($20 per session or $80 for all five in advance).  Call ahead to register 201-394-2319 or
7-8:30pm, Jan 6, Feb 3, March 2, April 6, May 4

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction Series with Mary Beth

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction
Everyone feels stress. You will learn the tools needed to diffuse, cope with, and avoid it. Channel energy otherwise spent on stress into positive energy in order to achieve abundance, happiness, and health. ($20 per class or $70 for all four in advance).  All classes held at my HoHoKus office.  Contact me to register at 201-394-2319 or
4 sessions
Fridays  6 – 7:30 – Jan 27, Feb 3, Feb 10, Feb 17

Monday, December 5, 2011

Making friends with yourself - let go!

Recently, and, actually, quite often, my clients come wanting to improve relationships with others. Good relationships often elude us. With many of us, it is often apparent that the relationship most in need of mending was relationship with self. How do we make friends with ourselves?

Are there people in your life who I call untouchables, meaning people with whom you forgive all and almost always employ understanding?  The upside to this type of behavior is that you already know how to forgive, to let go. Try pretending that you are one of those people. After a while, if something is for your benefit, the result could very well be lasting.   The downside of this behavior is that we sometimes stuff down feelings rather than feeling them, coming to terms with them and then letting go.  You will know which you are doing by your feelings. If you feel good, you have let go.  If you do not feel good, you are probably stuffing.

Why is letting go a good idea?  Sometimes we are conditioned to want retribution, or understanding, love, compassion or an apology. You might  never receive these from some others. They just might not be capable, or, they don't understand that they have wronged you.  More good news - you are capable of understanding, of forgiving and loving yourself. You know how you feel. Practice compassion.  Begin with yourself.

Try saying this short phrase: "even though I (whatever is upsetting you about yourself), I completely forgive and unconditionally love myself at this moment in time".   If you want to, you can put your hands over your heart as you say it, or even hug yourself.

You don't need to sustain the feeling - just say it. At first it may be foreign or feel like a lie, but keep it up every day for 21 days. Many studies say that it takes about three weeks to break a habit and start a new habit.  Maybe it will take you a bit longer, but hang in there.    Won't it be worth it?  Just in case you are not sure, the answer is yes!

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Twelve Blessings for a Wonderful Holiday Season

I was recently quoted by De'on Mallory, Fashion & Culture Writer, Stylist, Personal Shopper & Image Consultant, in the December issue of Bergen County, NJ's 201 Magazine about staying healthy and happy during the holiday season.  De'on's article lists a number of good tips for staying happy during the holiday season.  I enjoyed speaking with her when she was first putting the article together.  Here are a few tips for health and happiness, some from De'on, some from me.  I've also quoted Nutritionist Joy Bauer, and author and medium Karen Noe.
1. Put yourself on your own list - take care of yourself - no one else is going to do it for you!  You are in charge of your wellness.  This is my number one rule!
2. Schedule yourself so you can pace yourself.  Plan ahead and you'll know what you need when, and who is showing up.
3. Don't worry if the unexpected will pop up - it always does!
4. Keep and extra generic gift on hand - you will probably need it.
5. De'on says - take time to feel good on the outside - it is okay to look great!
6. Most of of say to stick to your budget - you'll feel better after the holidays.  Let's try and listen this year!
7. Joy Bauer, Nutritionist, says though it is hard to stick to a diet during the holidays, allow yourself one of each good thing - one drink, one of each of the appetizers, one dessert.  Though you may still indulge a little bit more than usual, it will give you some guideline for saying no and keeping in check, even while indulging yourself.
8. I always suggest that we take time to decompress and have a little quiet.  The holidays can be pretty frenetic.  Soft music helps, meditation and just breathing helps too!  How about taking a quick 10 minute quiet time - a little self-imposed time out.  Lay down, turn off the lights, close the door, turn everything off, just for a few minutes.  Alternately, get outside and breathe the fresh air for a few minutes.  Sunlight helps too.
9. Plan on a little altruism - giving makes us feel good. If you can't give money or gifts, give of your time.  Help out at a soup kitchen, or donate just a few canned goods.  It will help you get into the spirit of the season. Or, just reflect your love and blessings to others.
10. Remember, the holidays can be bright and sparkly, but it can also through some of us into a down mood.  We remember the people we miss who are no longer with us.  These times are milestones that sometimes cause us to look back and bring up old regrets.  We can only start from the present moment.  Go ahead and have your cry, but remember that today is a new day and we have a new chance to make our lives exactly the way we want to, starting from right this moment.  Envision exactly how you want to be, how you want to feel.  Imagine feeling that way, and it will actually help put you in that frame of mind and heart.
11. Accept help from others.  Whether it is monetary help or just help around the kitchen, say yes!  Make a list of what you are grateful for, who is in your life and the good things about them.
12. My talented friend, author and medium Karen Noe, suggests that we reflect on our lives and the people in it, and imagine what you could say to improve your relationship, if you could do it right now.  Take responsibility, write a letter telling them that you love them and that you wish them well.  Let go of blame and be filled with forgiveness.  You never have to mail the letter, but you will release yourself from having to carry around tough things from the past.

I hope these suggestions will help you have a wonderful, healthy and joyful holiday season!

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Change Your Life with Meditation and Therapy - How Do You Like That?

As a psychotherapist and hypnotherapist in private practice, I witness the positive effects of indivuals participating in their own wellness.  They feel better, in so many ways.  It was nice to come across two articles which bear out this notion.

Essentially, two articles, from two different modalities, talk therapy and meditation, both laud the positive effect of regular, positive reinforcement of the brain, whether in passive, mindful moments like meditation, or in active participation in talk therapy.   Interestingly, this idea, or practice, supports the notion that positive thoughts, actions and feelings do have a positive effect on an individual's mental health.  And we all know that when mental health is optimal, it has a positive effect on emotional well-being, intellectual prowess and even physical health.

Click here to read Dr Melanie Greenberg's great article on the positive effects of meditation, entitled Changing Your Brain To Change Your Mind

And a more clinical but just as encouraging article from Psychiatric Times (August 11, 2011) entitled How Psychotherapy Changes the Brain, for relief from depression, anxiety and the like. Visit my page on twitter to link to the article - #mbdelbalzo

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Health and Wellness Expo, Oct 29 in Woodcliff Lake, NJ, new space!

I will be a part of a large Health and Wellness Expo on Saturday, October 29 from 9-4 in Woodcliff Lake, NJ, (10 minutes from the Tappan Zee Bridge and 2 minutes from Rockland County) and I wanted to make you aware of the event.  I do not usually participate in these events, but found that this one seemed sound and well rounded.  I will be speaking at 9:30 am on staying healthy during the holidays.  Please feel free to contact me should you have any questions.   Also, if you know of anyone else you feel might be interested, thanks in advance for passing it along. Thanks!  Flier is below with coupon for discounted admission.

Secondly, just want to let you know that i have moved to a new, beautiful healing space in HoHoKus, New Jersey, where I will continue to work with others through psychotherapy and hypnotherapy, specializing in life transitions, easing anxiety and depression, and as a resource for hospice and grief counseling, family business counseling and food issues.  Please feel free to visit my website for full details.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Disordered Eating from a Healthy Start

So very many people with good intentions fall into bad "healthy" habits by accident, or through sheer lack of knowledge.

Jess Cording, long time blogger, posts regularly about healthy eating in her blog "Keeping It Real Food".  This article about orthorexia is worth a read...

When Obsession With Healthy Becomes Harmful 

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Social Media Marketing and Search Engine Optimization and Honoring your Soul's Intent

Though my blogs are so often about nurturing, self help, and self discovery, it has come to mind so often, especially in the past few months, regarding social media marketing, social networking and search engine optimization.  Without getting too philosophical or stretching the limits too much, aren't we still talking about communicating effectively and persuasively?  And, more importantly, isn't that what so many of us are striving for, frustrated by and working on, namely, communicating with others, and being heard?  Further, though our lives are not about being accepted and being a part of the bigger scheme of things, don't we also look to find a place that is comfortable for us, where we have people who understand us, and where we can serve our life's purpose, our soul's intent on this planet, so we can be happy, find our bliss?
Now we have jumped from the internet to the soul.  A bit scary, perhaps, but not so weird, after all.  To take it even a bit further, does anyone remember that song by Joan Osborne, "What if God Was One of Us"?  "...just a stranger on a bus trying to make his way home"...  I always loved this, as we often see the divine by looking into the eyes (or dreams or conversation) of another person.  Does the same hold true when we post, blog, text, chat?
Look for it, and be it.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Time to Reflect

Seems that the theme of many of my (infrequent) blogs lately have been rest and reflection.  I find myself with little time to do this, though it is so important for mind, heart, body and spirit.  Working in higher education and also separately in an independent therapeutic practice, I'm often working, but joyful for the varied and fascinating challenges, and the many wonderful people who I have the opportunity to meet and to work with.

In my education related position, working at a small, private college, we have faced many challenges.  The US Department of Education has put many regulations upon our sector of education has caused us to take time away from students, as well as away from our normal responsibilities and duties, and go in to "show me" mode.  Without going into great detail, we meet and exceed challenges, and continue to thrive while helping students to succeed.

My biggest challenge, apart from the one mentioned above, has been to develop and create an online division at The College of Westchester.  I am happy to report that as of June 29 we are fully operational.  Phase one of this project, creating the division, has taken two years to complete.  From inception, through to the present date, we have developed and received approval (from the New York State Education Department and Middle States Commission on Higher Education) to offer two programs fully online including our Associate Degree in Business Administration - Management/Marketing and our Bachelor (BBA) in Business Administration.  Phase two includes attracting and enrolling qualified students to participate in the first classes this September, and growing the college.  We already have some interest among alumni. 

Aside from raising two wonderful daughters and receiving my Masters in Social Work, this has been my greatest challenge and accomplishment.  I'm not going to take credit for it all myself, though.  It has taken so many people so much time and effort, and vision from our president and board, that I'm just the lucky one who has had the job to push through the process and steer the boat this time around.  It has been and continues to be great fun, and I truly am grateful for the opportunity.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Prescription for a gloomy, quiet day!

I"m in Cambridge MA visiting with my sister, Jenn.  It has been a busy few months at work; relentless, really.  I'm sure many other people can relate.   I finally have a quiet bit of time to just rest and reflect.  In reality, it has been 24 hours since I boarded the Amtrak to Back Bay station, ran out to a wonderful baby shower, dinner, etc, so I haven't had a chance to let my mind rest too much until this morning.  I'm staying at a lovely B&B, and am now tucked away able to write my first blog in a couple of months.

It is a gloomy morning, but I am anticipating a nice day of yoga, planning a party and lovely meal with loved ones, so there are fun things planned.  I don't have to leave until late Monday morning, also a bonus.  Until this present project in process at work is turned into a completed project, I'll just have to make due with the occasional respite.  I'll take it.

My suggestion for a gloomy day when you find yourself with a little extra time?  First, let yourself feel it.  Sometimes we roll through our days, and have the emotional ups and downs that we all have, aware or unaware of the reasons. If we don't let ourselves feel those feelings, they eventually make themselves known.  I woke up this morning still feeling that emotional roller coaster. Instead of immediately rushing to "feel better", I thought about where those feelings had come from, trying to put some framework around them.  Sometimes they are just there.  However, giving myself a chance to connect the dots was very helpful this morning.  The other point is that I actually had the time to clear my mind and do this!

I spent about 5 minutes meditating and clearing my mind as best I could.  Trust me, even after many years of meditating and self-hypnosis, this can take some doing.  After clearing my mind, I always ask if there is a message, thought or feeling for the day that will help.   Today I got the message to be grateful for all of the other people who are working hard right along side of me.  This is an important message as it took me out of feeling alone and left me feeling supported and, yes, loved, and grateful for those other people there with me in the trenches, day in and day out!

Easiest way to take those 5 minutes?  Find yourself a quiet place to just sit.  Turn off the TV or radio, set the alarm for 5 minutes.  Close your eyes and begin to breathe slowly and deeply.  Alternately, instead of breathing, just notice how your body is feeling and try to relax any spots that are holding tension by focusing your love and attention,one spot at a time.  At first, your mind may wander.  Just bring it back.  If you have trouble clearing your mind, think of a clear blue sky or the sound, feeling or look of running water. 

You will be amazed how fast those five minutes go.  Remember, this is called a practice for a reason - because we get better at it as we practice.  Some days are easier or harder than others.  Be gentle with yourself.  I promise to let myself have five minutes a day!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Words to live by!

One of my favorite sayings, from Uncle Al Pusz:
What you see here,
What you hear here,
When you leave here,
Leave it here.

(a framed slogan hanging in my Uncle Al's bar in the basement)

Friday, March 11, 2011

Adorable - Michaela Wallace and her viral video "Justin Bieber's Girlfriend"

or if you prefer to visit

Source Yahoo says Michaela Wallace, 14, has co-written the tween new girl anthem: a bubbly, Hanson "Mmmmbop"-esque song called "Justin Bieber's Girlfriend." The video for the song depicts Wallace receiving Bieber concert tickets in the mail and then attending his meet-and-greet and concert. It has received more than 1 million plays on YouTube.

Monday, February 28, 2011

Thought for a gloomy Monday afternoon

Someone always has it better, somebody always has it worse.  However, Oliver Julius, my sister Jenn's kitty, has it made in the shade.

In other news, Jim and I spent a really nice weekend in beautiful California!  It rained a lot, but finally cleared up long enough to get a couple of photos in the sun.

I'm not complaining, and feel like I am among the luckier today.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Like, loving this, you know?

Melina shared this with me - need i say more, like really?

hope you enjoy, if, like, maybe, it is your thing?

Monday, January 31, 2011

Reincarnation, Past Life Regression - Brian Weiss in NYC

I was fortunate enough to be invited to my friend, medium Karen Noe's, show a few months ago on a Saturday afternoon.  We talked about past life regression, reincarnation and healing.  It was a wonderful time, as we rarely have the opportunity to just sit down and talk.

Dr. Brian Weiss will be hosting an experiential workshop on Sunday, March 6, that i will attend in NYC with one of my sisters and a friend.  For details go to Hay House.  I loved the 2 hour session I participated in a few months ago - amazing!  This should be a great day.  Here is another blog I posted months ago about past life regression that might interest you.  Namaste!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Happy New Year

As cliche as it sounds, many find the new year a time for new beginnings, a fresh start.  I love this concept, and believe that a new beginning is available to us every day, every moment.  Seize the opportunity, at this moment, to accept yourself as you are and to believe in your highest potential and to make this moment the time to change, develop and grow.  You are perfect at this moment in time.

The light that is within me honors the light that is within you.  Namaste!