Amazing message from my mom, Jeanne

My beautiful mother, Jeanne, passed away in 1999. My girls, Jess and Julia, were young teens and Mom was the center of the family universe. Some people say that their loved ones visit in dreams or through signs once they pass, and my mom has sent coins, tails up, since a few days before she died.  She had a very subtle sense of humor, great compassion for others and was very shy. He was also very beautiful and had an incredible sense of style. We all have some of her gifts and qualities, but Jeanne was the whole deal.

This morning my husband Jim and I were snipping at each other, as we partners sometimes do. I needed to take some items out of the trunk of his car, (board games that needed to be put away) and that started it. 

Anyway, we carried the games down to the basement and I opened the small closet door to tuck them away. There was one thing that needed to move from the small closet to the bigger closet in order to fit everything, so I opened the bigger closet door.  

After I put away the small thing, I began looking to see if there was anything I needed from that closet. 

My eyes landed on a small pile of things to the right at eye level.  In the pile were the following things that I noticed:  a box of thank you notes that we sent to friends and loved ones along with a bunch of prayer cards that went in the envelope, all with her name on it "the family of Jeanne, etc". There was a blank writing journal that must have belonged to my daughter, Jess, little baby booklets for each of my girls that the pediatrician filled out during each of their first year, a little safe child booklet with one of my daughter's photos (Julia) when she was about 10, and a Valentine's Day card from Mom and Dad, signed by Mom, to me and my husband.   Oh yes, the last thing was an empty little angel stand that had several wire holders for photos. (Jess, Julia and I just had pictures taken yesterday). 

After crying a bit, because I still miss my mom a lot, I realized that she was sending us a very specific message of love and encouragement, to each and every one of us individually. 

Julia's message was for safety and love, reminding her that she is so beautiful and precious, encouragement to Jessica with the journal, reminding her that she still has so much life to write about, and to keep on going, and to remind me and my husband that she misses and loves us too and that my father loves us too. The valentines card was especially loving, and the thank you cards a prayer from Jeanne to all of us. 

It was such a clear message that I think it is for all of us that love her; friends, family and loved ones, as she is sending that love and thanks to each of you, and a specific message to me, Jim, Jess and Julia today. 

So, all I can say today is thank you so much, Mom!!  I will always love you so much.

Snow

Can you believe this snow?  I live in Bergen County, New Jersey and work in both Bergen County and Westchester County NY.  The snow this winter has been especially interesting.  It comes in time for us to close schools in the morning, in order for students, faculty and staff to be safe.  The snow has certainly been plentiful this season.  And, even though it is beautiful, I am ready for Spring. 

When weather slows down our pace, I have to wonder if, in fact, this is a deliberate way to get the human race to take a breath, stop and reflect.  We all talk about Springtime being the time for rebirth and fresh starts.  I look at Winter as the time we can be introspective, spend time in meditation and quiet growth and planning, in order to be ready for the explosion of color, growth and freedom in Spring.

Instead of lamenting the cold weather and snow, think about taking time to enjoy your family, your pets, the quiet that the blanket of snow gives us.  It is here for us, a reminder that we deserve peace, rest and reflection.



White Plains Metro North Train Station original at flickriver.com

Getting on the Paleo Bandwagon - strap in!

Everyone is getting on the Paleo bandwagon.  While I am not doing that, I do enjoy a good Waldorf salad, and concocted this one, which can be paleo friendly.  While I don't want to put the pressure on, as my sis Jenn and I will say (no pressure) is Eat and Enjoy - I Command It!

The pounding can be therapeutic, too.

Asian Waldorf Chicken salad (can be made Paleo style)

Combine in a medium bowl

1 chicken breast pounded, salt and peppered, grilled and cut up in bite-sized pieces (pound with a pounding mallet or a Fred Flinstone-like implement)

1/2-1 apple cored and cut up

2 stalks celery chopped 

1/4 cup walnuts or other nuts chopped (if you wish)

For sauce - combine in small bowl and whisk till smooth

1 tablespoon Paleo mayo

2 teaspoons ponzu (or teriyaki coconut aminos for paleo)

1-2 teaspoons white miso

1/8 teaspoon Siracha or to your liking

(You can also add some chopped cilantro if you love it like I do!)

Pour sauce over chicken ingredients and toss well

Serve over your favorite greens.  I like chopped arugula.

Refrigerate leftovers or feed to your pet dinosaur. 

What is a therapeutic referral and why is it important?

When a potential client reaches out to me, I am honored to have been chosen, and I appreciate the effort it takes to finally make that phone call or write that email.  I have been there and I truly understand that it sometimes takes major discomfort to be ready to consider change.  I used to call it opening Pandora's box. 

Of late, I am very busy with my work, both at The College of Westchester in White Plains, NY and in my private practice in New Jersey. 

I count on colleagues who are caring and compassionate therapists who I can refer people who are in need of a professional who can assist them in their healing, their wellbeing and to help them sort things out, make changes or not, as the case may be.

If you are an individual in need of someone who understands what you are going through, please allow me to connect you with people I trust.  It is enough of a leap of faith to contact me.  I do my best to connect with someone who may provide the safety net to explore uncharted or over-fished territories in your life.

I also encourage you to have someone by your side when you open your Pandora's box.  It may be difficult or scary, but I can assure you that you are worth the effort, and deserve the support you are asking for.

Spend time in reflection, for happiness and self-healing this holiday season

During the holidays, I finally have a chance to begin to reflect and rejuvenate, spend time with my husband, my girls (grown and working) and our doggies, Eli, Janey and Satch (below).  Ease and reflection are my biggest gifts to myself.  I subscribe to Marc and Angel Hack Life, a wonderful blog, that I actually have time to read when there is a little space in my day and in my mind.  Blessings to you and yours during this beautiful holiday season.  May you find love, joy and peace all around you, and within you. 

I hope you enjoy this crosspost from Marc and Angel Hack Life - 27 Simple Things to Start Doing For Your Happiness

I really do love their blog.  In this blog, I especially love #2 - Start filtering out the noise in your life. – Be careful about who you give the microphone and stage to in your life.  Don’t just listen to the loudest voice.  Listen to the truest one.

Another favorite, #6, echoes the wonderful teachings of Jon Kabat-Zinn, wonderful guru of mindfulness;  Start being present. – If your mind carries a heavy burden from the past, you will experience more of the same.  Let it go.  And also be careful not to dwell so much on creating your perfect future life that you forget to live today.  Be here now and make the most of it. 

There are many wonderful suggestions from this blog, in fact each of the 27 are gems, so I am sharing one more and suggest you read the entire blog for yourself. 

Here is one more, #23; Start focusing only on what you can control. – Never force anything.  Give it your best shot and then let it be.  If it’s meant to be, it will be.  Don’t hold yourself down with things you can’t control.

Oh the days trickle down to a precious few...

 

Fall is almost with us.  I chuckle as I say this, as it is almost 90 degrees outside as I write this afternoon, the dog days of summer.  However, there are signs in NJ and NY that autumn is coming, that cannot be denied.  The sun rises later and sets sooner.  I measure these things by the trek to work, with that rising sun hitting me in the eyes, and just a bit darker as I walk to my car in the early evening to make the drive home.  My drive is about 20 miles, so the change in rote is very noticeable to me. 

I smell the freshness and coolness in the air in the early morning as my dogs make their first run outside.  The earth smells differently than it does in the heat of summer.  Plants are beginning to change, getting ready to move back into themselves, away from the huge explosion of growth through late spring and summer.

I try to embrace every season, but it is hard to keep my thoughts away from school, from cooler darker days.  I work at a college and it is always a joy to meet our new students.  They are ready for a fresh start, full of expectation, sometimes nervousness, as well as bravado to hide the nervousness.

Meanwhile, I'll try to get ready for the cooler weather, the need for a sweater, a coat, even a hat.  Are you ready?

Welcome Spring!

Hello and blessings for a wonderful Spring!  I am so glad that Spring is finally upon us in northern New Jersey.  The snow finally melted and the daffodils are up and in full bloom.  Yay!  As soon as I smell the spring air, my spirit is lifted and my dreams soar.  What are your fondest wishes for Spring?